Saturday, September 22, 2012

My Beef with Gluten-Free Blogs

It has now been slightly over two years since I found out I have a gluten intolerance, and a few months shy of   two years being gluten free (I was definitely in denial for the first few months). I am happy to report that going gluten free has proved highly beneficial for my emotional and physical health, although it has been one heck of a ride psychologically. To give up something so ingrained into American culture (you can't even eat regular Ranch dressing for crying out loud!) and even more so ingrained in typical American Mormon culture has been more than difficult.

It's kind of funny. Once you find out you have to go gluten free, all of a sudden, a whole city seems to surface with all kinds of resources and ideas to help you, that it all seems overwhelming. There are SO many blogs out there that are gluten-free or gluten-free and dairy-free, or gluten-free, lactose-free, egg-free, meat-free, your-mom-free, you get the idea. Everyone tells you, look up this blog or, this site has great recipes, etc. What the DON'T tell you, is that most of the whatever-free blogs out there are written by people that are at least 5 years into this process. So while every gluten-free blog has a different answer to questions about the exact 12 kinds of flours that you need to make a loaf of bread the same texture, color, and density as your favorite childhood bread, they DON'T have answers to the questions a new gluten-free person really wants answered like "My whole pantry is stocked with foods now declared as poisonous. What do I eat this week so I don't starve to death or just kill myself since it would easier?" Or, "what can I feed my newly diagnosed son for lunch tomorrow since we've been buying lunch regularly? Since he is now gluten intolerant, there is probably nothing at the school cafeteria that he could eat." Or maybe you're just wondering "how do I not hate my life?" Or, "how do I avoid hating all the people around me that can eat all of my favorite foods while I must suffer in bitter anguish?" One thing I still haven't figured out is how to navigate social situations. There's always food! And it gets really awkward really quickly when someone asks you like you're an alien, "you don't want any cake?" And then there's this unavoidable 10 minute pitty conversation explaining why you can't and going through all the things you can't eat and the other person expressing sympathy, telling you how hard that must be. Just re-open the wound, why don't you?? But, I digress.

Here's the point. When you're new to the gluten-free way of life, the LAST thing you want is to sift through 100 complicated gourmet recipes of how to make red velvet cake cupcakes to find something for tonight's dinner. What you'd really like to know is what to do with what you already have in the pantry. Unless you're a chef or have cooking and baking as a main hobby, you're probably more concerned with surviving than with buying 20 different ingredients you can't pronounce and you probably don't know how to use. My guess is, you'd really like to not starve.

If this is your plight, my friend, my first suggestion is, DON'T LOOK AT GLUTEN-FREE BLOGS. They will most likely overwhelm you. You probably don't have the time or the interest to try so many cake and cookie recipes anyways. Don't worry, you'll probably get there in a few years, and you'll probably start a blog just like them, but for now just focus on today, tomorrow, or this week. Find ways to adapt the meals you like to eat. Substitute different ingredients for glutenous ones. Be bold with new combinations. And don't worry, you'll fail a few times, but that's the fun of it!